Sunday, March 1, 2009


I'm sitting at Corner Bakery trying to get some work done between Cole's sporting events, and an older gentleman just came up and gave me a lovely sketch he did of me on a napkin. I was so flattered. How nice that he had been sitting there watching me and thought enough to draw this nice sketch. He even asked my name and wrote "Beautiful Laura" on it. At this point, being called "beautiful" by any man - no matter how old and crooked his teeth are - makes me very happy.

But then I just noticed that one of the older women playing bridge ALSO has one of his sketches. Huh. He wasn't just noticing me. My vanity had to know if he had written "beautiful" on hers. I couldn't help it. I casually walked by her table and saw that hers had the word "sexy" above her name. SEXY? WTH?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

I am at least 20 years younger than that woman and have at least 20 fewer wrinkles. Once again my pride has been kicked right out of me, which I probably needed. Don't you hate that whole sanctification thing?

Friday, February 20, 2009


Stopped by 7-11 this morning and once again was struck by the fact that the place was packed with various landscapers, construction workers and people who generally looked like they work on some sort of a crew. They're there buying breakfast and drinks and snacks.

What gets to me is that convenience stores are the most expensive places for shopping. I'm pretty sure the various crew members in the store would not be considered upper income. I truly want to just gather them all in a circle and say "Listen, guys, you could save a heck of a lot of money if you would just get a little organized. Let's all give John here two dollars, and send him over to Walmart. He can buy us all big bags of chips, six packs of drinks, bags of snacks in bulk and a whole box full of donuts. We'll have to do some sharing, but trust me, it will be worth it."

I figure they could probably save $4 a day with this plan, which would be $20 per week. Come on guys, surely you're feeling the need to cut back like the rest of us?

(I forgot to mention that the reason I was in the 7-11 was to buy a single Diet Coke for $1.50. I can buy a six-pack at Walmart for $2.90. Do the math. It's not pretty.)

Wednesday, February 18, 2009


Turns out there is something worse than sitting at home on Valentine's Day night working while your son is out to dinner with your ex-husband's girlfriend. My friend A. spent her Valentine's Day evening out to dinner WITH her ex-husband and his girlfriend (as in the girlfriend-that-was-the-other-woman-and-broke-up-the-marriage girlfriend). It was her son's fourth birthday, so there they all were - one, big, happy family (????) - at Chuck E. Cheese.

It is so painful what we single moms grin and bear sometimes for the sake of our kids.

My friend K.'s 9-year-old son had to write an essay about someone who had made a difference in his life. He wrote about his dad's girlfriend (as in the girlfriend-that-was-the-other-woman-and-broke-up-the-marriage girlfriend). He proudly had his mom review it before he turned it in. Talk about a knife in the heart.

Saturday, February 14, 2009


I have spent the evening working and trying to ignore the fact that it is Valentine's Day - much easier to spend the evening alone on Valentine's Day when it's on a school night. Saturday night gives it a bit of an ouch this year. The ouch is ouchier knowing that my son is out with his dad and his dad's girlfriend, trying to teach the girlfriend's son how to take his mom on a date. OUCH.

My 2009 Valentine's Day loot:
- Card, candy and cash(!) from my mom - she knows I need to feel loved!
- Card from Dorothy, a college friend who sends a card on every holiday to every person she has ever known
- Card from local realtor offering "A HEARTfelt thanks for all your continued support!" She actually left two of these cards on my porch AND they are accompanied by a miniature bag of Sweethearts. Awww. I'm going to pretend she didn't leave the card on every single porch in the neighborhood.

Not a great pull this year. Of couse, it's better than two years ago when the only cards I got were from Dorothy (of course) and my therapist. Can you say LOSER?

Tip #2 (tip #1 was to help her get her Christmas tree out of the attic) for being kind to a single mom: SEND HER A CARD ON VALENTINE'S DAY. Remind her that she is loved. Come on people. Doesn't anyone remember that Valentine's Day could be a big downer for those of us who used to be wined and dined and are now stuck at home on Valentine's night trying to make money to pay bills that we never used to worry about?

Friday, February 13, 2009


OK. I'll start with an apology - if anyone is still reading this blog, I am sorry for my lack of entries. I have a variety of excuses, all of which involve needing to do real work that makes me real money that pays my very real mortgage.

I have joined Facebook. Yea! A 2009 goal already complete. It really is fun and a bit addictive. Who would have known that I would care to know that my long lost grade school friend is headed to a Girl Scout meeting or an old co-worker is watching American Idol or a client has a head cold? Seeing those updates is strangely voyeuristic. (I know I butchered that spelling - too lazy to check it)

The surprising thing for me has been the junior high, butterflies-in-the-stomach experience of wondering who might want to be my friend. I send out those friend requests with a twinge of anxiety, hoping that the person deems me worthy of being a friend.

And then there's the little shot of ego boost that you get when you see there is a friend request for you. Someone wants to be my friend! I am worthy! Somebody remembers me and likes me!

There's also the slightly torturous game of watching those people in the "people you may know" list. OK, yeah, I know them but I'm not going to ask them to be my friend. I bet my name is showing up on their "people you may know" list. Will they pick me? Am I worthy to them? Do they want to be my friend? Especially with guys from the past, I find this strangely stressful.

After seeing my fourth-grade boyfriend on my "people you may know" list for about two weeks and wondering if he still liked me, I got his request. He wants to be my friend! I felt like the George Strait song "Check Yes or No" (you know how it goes: Do you love me? Do you wanna to be my friend? Well if you do, then don't be afraid to take me by the hand, if you want to. I think this is how love goes. Check yes or no.) How exciting it was to "check yes" to his friend request. He still likes me!

Wednesday, January 28, 2009


I went by the bank today to check on an account I remembered yesterday as I was trying to figure out how I'm going to pay the bills this month. The account was "dormant" but did have $700 in it. Yipee.

In my pathetic (and slightly desperate) search for the account with the bank's "personal banker" it came out that I have a business account with them. Well, he must have pressed a red button under the desk or something because the next thing you know there are FOUR bankers in the office with me. I try to explain that I own a small business - a really small business. But, they were all smiles even while looking at my meager account. They must be really hard up.

Next thing you know I'm in another office getting some credit card that's going to allow me to have no minimum on my business account, and then another banker is asking me if I have a Roth IRA. I keep trying to explain that I really don't have that much money. He says "Well, my advice is always start by having 8 to 12 months of living expenses saved and then look at things like a Roth-IRA." 8 to 12 months? Seriously? Clearly I won't be buying an IRA from him any time soon.

Friday, January 23, 2009


Just drove by single dad's house, and there he was. And I am here. Single dad is, well, a single dad who lives a mere five houses down from me. He is cute, nice and age-appropriate. However, we have never gotten beyond a few brief conversations at block parties and a "hi there" when we stopped by for trick-or-treating. Bummer.

He has a chain link fence and usually keeps the blinds in his den open. Many a night I have driven slowly by to see him eating alone on his black leather couch watching TV as I make my way home to eat alone on my brown couch while watching TV. Sigh.

Now some people might think that sounds a bit stalker-ish, but I prefer to think of it as being neighborly. What if he's in there choking on a strawberry? Who could help him? Or, what if he trips over a misplaced pair of shoes, falls and hits his head? Who would see him laying there unconcious? ME. I would see him (unless he has his lights off or it's during the day - then he'll just have to die) because I am being neighborly.

As an aside, he lives in a kind of creepy house. When he first moved in and showed up at the block party a few years ago, we were all like "OH, you bought THAT house" and he was all like "Yes.....yes, I did....and is there something I'm missing here?" And we're all like "Uh, well, you do know about that house, right?" And he's like, "Uh, what?" Then we tactfully told him that the previous owner had committed suicide in the garage - by shooting himself. He didn't know. Oh my.

I'll keep you updated on single dad. Maybe I'll do a drive-by here in a bit to make sure he hasn't been electrocuted or otherwise's the neighborly thing to do.